I live in one of the most populated cities in the world. But within this city, I have seen and experienced the most prolific solitude of my life. Not only personally have I felt the most individualized and lonely, but on the streets of New York, I have seen the mask of loneliness and solitude crafted on so many people. I don't think I understood what loneliness is until I lived in this city.
New York is about going after an individual goal. Most, almost all, of the wonderful people that I have met are all here because they made a decision to do something big in their life, they are committed to creating something bigger than themselves, achieving a goal, chasing a dream, proving something to themselves or others. This is a kinship that is shared within this city. But at times, the pursuit of something - all of the chasing, proving, achieving, and creating can have the side effect of loneliness.
But loneliness is a word with such indication. It's definition, sound and even the look of the word, two l's standing high amongest a mess of smaller case letters, is sad and slightly pitiful. At times, yes, it is the right word for how I feel in this city. But in this post, i think a better word is solitude.
The side effect of exploration right now for me is......solitude.
And I'd rather not judge that as good or bad.
